I really enjoyed these chapters, perhaps because there was something I could personally identify with in every one of them.
The first chapter, chapter 4, was about international students. I suppose I can identify because I have been in international contexts a lot, and I've also been an American--and around Americans. I also have had experience with the shoe on the other foot, where I was expected to fit in with some of the norms of other countries (for example making friends with your friend's parents) and how hard that can be for an independent American who doesn't want intimacy too quickly because of the obligations that might be involved.
I like what Nathan said about the friendly veneer. It is so true that Americans use the veneer to grease any number of social wheels but that it can't be taken as genuine affection or interest. I have often observed that "We should get together some time" is a polite fiction unless it is followed up with an exact day and time. It has to be hard for non-Americans to get used to that. What was also funny about this chapter was Nathan's report of how shocking international students found the informality of the American classes. I had a colleague of mine read the excerpt and we both chuckled, because our classrooms are much the same. We even occasionally have students come to class in their pajamas, although probably not as frequently as in the U.S. I'm also not sure that they do all the same things in the classes they have with Chinese teachers. The teacher does a lot to set the tone of a classroom.
In chapter 5, Nathan points out that the focus of campus life is not academics--yet another observation that I could have told her. Still it is very nice to have it articulated the way that she does. I think in all of my school career, I tended to be the one labeled as a "witch" according to Nathan's experience. It's a very subtle thing, and I think her way of making it explicit was genius, because for many of us who experience it, it's like an itch somewhere which we can't quite put our finger on. I think this is why I hate being a student. I'm good at it, but I never fit into the ruling social paradigm and so I end up relatively isolated. I thought it would get less as I progressed further into graduate school, but that has not been my experience. Somehow loving ideas for their own sake is still "uncool" even sometimes at a doctorate level.
I suppose that is what comes of trying to make higher education accessible to all. Some people don't like ideas. They aren't good at generating or using them, but they are good at managing social situations. These people are encouraged and motivated, perhaps by desires for better jobs or career advancement, to engage in a pass-time that they naturally dislike and so they use their social skills to marginalize that pass-time in the lives of all of their social group. Those who do like to learn are shamed into silence in the very environment where they might ideally thrive. That, it appears to me, is one of the main problems of higher education. It tries to be all things to all people and ends up being a social finishing school for the elite--who aren't necessarily the smartest or the most motivated. Money, natural attractiveness, the right kind of cultural background, and social skills have a lot more to do with it.
Chapter 6 talks about the "art of college." I enjoyed Nathan's many insights on the way students negotiate college, because they were refreshingly realistic and reflective of my own experience. I sometimes think we get off track because most teachers and professors at universities were the overachieving types in their class (they were the "learners" from the Strengths Finder paradigm), so they end up measuring all their students by themselves. Yes, students make a lot of pragmatic decisions when it comes to their education--and most of them don't have enough energy left to really suck all the learning opportunities dry. I liked Nathan's account of the delusional advice given to students about how to plan their week. I have been present for such talks, and ignored them like most other students.
In Chapter 7, Nathan gives instructors some really good advice that I wish more teachers in my program would take to heart. She points out that when students start falling asleep in your class, "As hard as it may be to realize sometimes, it is really not personal." I think if more teachers came to terms with this--and realized that students are going to take the easy route if you give it to them, they would be much better teacher for it.
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